Old Russian Jokes

USA: "We have a free speech. You can say anything you want. You can come to the White House and say that the American president is asshole".
Soviet Union: "We have a free speech as well. You can say anything you want. You can also come to the Red Square and say that the American president is asshole".


When the first direct phone line was established between White House and Kremlin, Brezhnev calls Carter (may be, it was not Carter, but who cares):
- Jimmy, I had nightmare. In my dream, White House was repainted to Red.
Next night, Carter calls Brezhnev:
- Leonid, I also had nightmare. I saw Red Square - all red with big red sign on the Kremlin.
- And what was written on the sign?
- No idea, I do not understand Chinese.


Do you know the one about the rabbit in DDR? a rabbit went everyday to a butcher and asked for carrots. After a lot of days the butcher was angry and nailed him to the wall. The rabbit looked in front of him and there was the picture of Erich Honecker. So he asked: did you wanted some carrots also?

Thanks to Nesher and MandyM from YST for the jokes :-)